I haven’t done a very good job this year of writing as much as I wanted to. Every month in my bullet journal one of my goals is to write more/post more. I even have a habit tracker that is blog related that has been empty for months. I started this blog because I wanted a hobby when I moved up to Virginia after the wedding. And I thought maybe I could help one person out or make them laugh by telling my stories.
But the more I got involved in the community of milso bloggers, the more I read and saw what others were posting about and how their blogs looked. Which is great for getting ideas and seeing what people are reading, but not always great when you’re trying to figure out what the heck you’re even trying to do. I looked at all these wildly successful blogs and thought that I immediately needed to be just like them to be successful and have people want to follow me and read what I wrote. I was reading articles about how to be found in searches and the types of posts that most people responded to, but they weren’t the types of posts that I wanted to write. Not to say that everything that I have written so far wasn’t my own thoughts. It’s just that I was creating content that I thought people wanted to read and not that I necessarily wanted to write.
After a while, even though I had topic ideas, I didn’t want to write about any of them, so I just stopped. I felt so much pressure to write a perfect post that would get lots of likes or attention that I just didn’t want to write. But I realized today that all this pressure I was feeling was coming from nowhere but my own mind! I’m nowhere near wildly successful, and I should be doing what I want! I need to write about what I want, not what I think people want to be reading. That doesn’t mean this won’t be a Navy Wife blog, but I think I can stray a little bit from posting entirely about military topics all the time, especially if I don’t have anything to talk about. I mean, I went on a trip to London with the Sailor and would like to “talk” about it on a forum where people might actually want to hear about it!
Comparing myself to all the others, especially famous ones, was unhealthy and it killed my passion. And that’s all this was, a passion project. I have a full-time job, a husband, a house, a family in another state and other hobbies that take up my time, so this shouldn’t be something that makes me feel bad about myself. So, the posts might be a little more erratic sometimes, especially while the Sailor is on shore duty. Next year he will be up for chief and we will have to decide if reenlistment is the next step, and I’m sure I will have a few more things to talk about. But in the times when the Navy isn’t the biggest part of my life, I’m going to write about what is. Because the Navy isn’t my entire life, just part of it.